6 Myths About Missionaries That Members Need To Stop Believing
6 Myths About Missionaries That Members Need To Stop Believing.
1st You Are A Bad Missionary If You Go Home Early.
Some people assume that when they are told someone came home for medical reasons it is really a cover for a worthiness problem. To that I will address the root problem, so what if they came home for worthiness? Are you upset that someone has started the repentance process by confessing their sins? The whole point of the gospel and the atonement is to allow people to repent and be forgiven of their sins. Missionaries who come home as part of repentance are the definition of living the gospel, I would rather they repent and come home than serve unworthily.
Instead of judging and shaming early returned missionaries, let us help them fulfill their potential! They need friends, family, and leaders who will love and support for them. President Monson once quoted Mother Theresa who said. “If you judge people, you have no time to love them.”
2nd Sisters are better than Elders.
I cannot tell you how many times I have heard members say that Sisters are better than Elders, sadly I had many members tell me or other Elders that Sisters were better than us. In one of my areas the Sister Training Leader we shared the area with, actually apologized to us for how the members treated us! Seriously, what good does it do to compare Elders vs Sisters? I have seen amazing Sisters and amazing Elders, we are different, we have different abilities and opportunities and doors that open to each of us, the Lord does not compare and pick favorites, neither should members of His church.
3rd Good Missionaries Go Foreign.
There is a cultural undertone that believes that good missionaries go foreign, whereas many good missionaries have gone foreign many good missionaries have also gone stateside. In the Book of Mormon, you have the tale of two groups of missionaries, Alma and Amulek were "stateside" so to speak and Ammon and his brothers were foreign. They both went exactly where the Lord needed them, and they were amazing missionaries, and the same happens today. Whether you are called stateside or foreign, as a full-time proselytizing missionary or as a service missionary, remember; the difference between a good missionary and a bad missionary is not where they serve, but how they serve. President J. Reuben Clark taught this when he said, “In the service of the Lord, it is not where you serve but how.”
Sisters Young, Hutchison, Strong, Phinhey, Hall, And Elder and Sister Mills. Mormon Trail Center Missionaries.
4th You Lose The Spirit When You Come Home.
5th Leadership Makes You Important.
6th Successful Missionaries Baptize Often.
Understanding that most of the time you will be planting seeds is paramount to understanding the true nature of missionary work. Whether you are a full-time missionary or a member missionary, you should always be planting seeds. If you want a harvest then you must plant and water!
PS If you liked this article you'll love this one: 5 Things Missionaries Wish Church Members Knew!
I'm not quite sure who believes these things, or why; but I for one have never believed these things. Not even the coming home early one.
Can there be an article about what members aren't to do with missionaries? In one city on my mission, I came to associate the place with Ammonihah due to the member's ease with missionaries in that too often the members would almost purposefully waste our time, welcome us in while a game was on the TV, and overall, encourage us in many instances to be lazy and be disobedient to missionary rules. I wish those members would recognize that not only were they hindering the work but they, by their actions, taught that repentance did not happen.
Interesting thought.
Growing up in my home ward, we had a family -- good people, just a bit off on some of their gospel understanding. They wanted very much for their two teen daughters to marry returned missionaries when they reached that age. As a result, they would invite the elders over for dinner frequently (this was some 40 years ago) with the express purpose of trying to set up their daughters with missionaries who might return after their missions.
Thank you for this. Attitudes like this-mainly the one about good missionaries being sent foreign-caused so much stress in my life that I eventually left the church for a long time after my bishop told me that. I served in Washington State. People don't understand the power of things like this have on young adults who are already in a transitional period post mission.
How unfortunate.
I live in Eastern Washington -- grew up here since first grade and still live in the Spokane area. We love the missionaries who come to our area -- awesome young men for the most part -- still keep in touch with many of them.
I served my mission in Germany -- not because I felt like I was any better than other elders, I just felt that I could do some good there. My mission president taught us that each missionary is specifically called because of something they and only they can do in their area of assignment. I can only assume that you touched at least one person -- probably didn't even know about it, that made all the difference for them.
Thanks for serving a mission -- even in the Podunk state of Washington.
I served a mission in Europe. I knew a lot a great Elders and Sisters in my mission, but there were the rare bad apples. Where you are called doesn't mean anything more about you than that is where the Lord wants you to be.
The Sisters are better one is pretty common, but really there isn't much of a difference, I had to deal with both as a DL.
I agree with all of these, especially #1 and #5
One comment on #4 "You Lose The Spirit When You Come Home"
As worded it is false, but it is true you are going to feel less spiritual when you are no longer on your mission because you are going to be doing things which are not spiritual experiences. You simply have less spiritual experiences after your mission - but that does not mean you are less spiritual or that you lost the spirit.
For example, paying the bills (house, car, phone, utilities, etc) is something you simply did not have to deal with on your mission, and it is something that is not a spiritual experience. The same goes with trying to be promoted at work, shopping for groceries, home maintenance, shopping for clothes, and any of a hundred other everyday things.
Whereas I agree that you have a lot more 'non-spiritual' things you need to do as an RM, I can honestly say I have felt the spirit more, and seen more miracles in the three years since coming home than I did on my mission.
That was my experience as well.
Especially while serving in a bishopric, I would take opportunity to chat with missionaries assigned to our ward -- that we were grateful they came and for a time they would look back at the "Best two years of their life." BUT if several years down the road they were still thinking that their missions were the best two years of their lives, that they were missing out on life. I told them that spiritual experiences come almost natural for missionaries because of the nature of being a missionary -- but after their missions, they will have to work a bit more for those spiritual experiences, but in turn, they would be far greater than anything they experienced before.
You do lose the "missionary spirit" becasue the mantel is lifted from you when you are released. Just like a bishop when he is released. he is still a man of God, but his job is done and his mantel is removed.
I truly appreciate the point of a missionary coming home early, when a call is received the letter states "up to 24 months." As members we need to remember that and wrap our arms around them. It is hard enough coming home early for whatever reason. And yes, the young man went inactive becasue of more then one horrible statement.
Wonderful thoughts thank you!
Whereas I would agree you lose the mantel, I would argue that one can still have the missionary spirit if they are still engaged in the work of salvation. My greatest spiritual experiences have bene post-mission spiritual experiences.
As a sister missionary I was flat out told that we weren't "real" missionaries.i have never heard that sisters are better except in situations where they thought that sisters would be better for a specific person/family. Those were mainly due to the needs or trust of the specific person.
As to where you serve I served stateside and it was the best toughest greatest experience of my life. Missionaries are called to serve where The Lord needs them. Anyone who believes otherwise...well...
The spirit is different when you return home not diminished but different.
As to the rest...it is sad that people so quickly judge others
Gayle, I am so sorry you were told you were not a real missionary. That is awful and not true.
who are all these judgy people? we love all missionaries here in new York!
As the spouse of a convert, the 4th phase of missionary work is a myth. In 14 years since baptism, Stake and full time missionaries have been to our home less than a dozen times, and only 2 of the new member discussions were given.
Great Article. I agree all the way.
My name is munyoroku , served in Kenya Nairobi Mission (1998-2000) , Once a missionary always a missionary . Challenges will always be there but always choose the right . I grow tea in Rural Kenya in Nyeri County and I work in the coffee sector in Kenya, one of the role I play is advocating for the growing of coffee , consumption of Roasted coffee , so as to improve farmers earnings . in my mission I remember Discussion 4 , we used to teach Investigators to abstain from harmful substances and Coffee & Tea was one of them , 17 years down the line now I'm doing the opposite . is this not an if irony of life , you be the Judge.
I have heard all of these stories. #6: An Elder from my mission was stellar in 'the work' for his two years and went home with no baptisms. He felt a failure. At the mission first reunion he wasn't in attendance but the President told us his story after he came home. He was made the ward 'Mission Leader,' and during the first year he baptized nine families (not nine individuals, but families of various numbers). That his mission was to prepare him for after his mission.
I had one son come home and to the High Council gave his report in tears. His two mission presidents had chosen him to babysit the problem elders. The Pres. told him, "Elder you are the only one in the mission who gets along with everybody, and I know that where ever I put you you will be a success."
I served state side and always felt 2nd class. This came from FHE groups in college and the general membership of the Church. I told this to a Home Teacher that I had who had just been released as the Bishop. He corrected me immediately on the error in my perception. Many who serve stateside have some of the toughest environments to work in.
One item not addressed is the feeling that being a convert one was inferior to those born in the Church. I once felt that way, a convert companion felt that way too. Even my wife felt that way about me. One evening while contemplating what to say in a Stake Conference on family history, I realized while looking at my extended pedigree chart that two things were dominant about my ancestors. 1) I was the 26th veteran of the US military to have served during war (Vietnam) in my lineage, and that two had been killed. 2) That of my ancestors 16 were ministers serving on the frontier mostly. One was the first ordained minister in New Jersey; another was whipped at the stake in Boston Commons for being a Baptist; and another was thrown into prison with the charge of 'treason against the Crown' for being a Baptist. I turned to my wife and said, "Once I felt inferior as a convert member, but now I see that my ancestors built & formed a country so that your ancestors could help in restoring the gospel & building the Kingdom of God."
I heard a story once of a missionary who returned home feeling his mission was a failure as he only baptized one backwards hillbilly who didn't have enough sense to wear shoes - as he put it to his stake president.
The stake president was so troubled by this young man's discouragement that he looked up that man and learned that over the years -- he put on shoes, got an education, married and had several sons who all served missions -- and combined, they had baptized close to a thousand people into the church within two or three generations.
My family joined the church 150 years ago. Okay and I am proud of that, but my testimony is mine, not my grandfathers -- though he contributed to it, I had to pay the price for it and continue to do so. I always admire converts so much! I was born into the church -- that was easy. How inspired I am by people who find the church, embrace it - many times against tremendous odds and are so faithful to something that so many of us almost take for granted. Thanks for your example.
I have agree with you on a lot of your point of view , but I have a little problem with when a missionary returns home . I was one of those missionary's that came home and became lost , not knowing where to turn too . So I returned to my old job in whice I was making a lot of money . I had bills I had to pay 7 days after I came . My release from mission came 3 months after I was home . I did not talk or see my stake President for that 3 months I tried to see him was told he was to busy . I saw my Bishop for about 10 minutes and that was it . I drove truck and was gone a lot my elder quorum pres keep on my back about home teaching , pretty tough to do that out of town . So my lose of the spirit became worse until I became almost totally inactive. I see a alto of misxionarys that come and leAve the church for one reason or another . I believe it because the leadership in there wards and stake just drop them . They feel lonely for the spirit or some one just to recognize stake in the ward or s frtake but no one dose excep the out side world influence or the family.y is having problems like devorice . Staying active would be grate but most missionaries need to be re enterdouse to the world with out that same spirit they need help on what direction they have , school , jobs , housing , how they will make it in this world . Some suffer from mental problems , no help from parents , they feel like there in a dark field and have not any idea of where to go . So I think you need to rethink about those that come home and what they should do.
I love the sixth part, I'm on a mission now in Lagos Nigeria Mission and I use to think that if I don't get baptisms at the end of the month, I am an unsuccessful missionary despite all my efforts. I love the words used there as Planting, Watering, Harvesting and Retaining. Thank you very much!
Truly the Lord knows how to answer all ..im glad to have read this.....hope most will and may correct themselves and myself ..may the spirit be our guide continually...so we could be an inspiration instead to others.
Myth 2, I'm not sure I concur with you on this, after all was it not 2 Elders who stumbled upon a magic lamb on the shore , when they found out they had only three combined wishes they put their minds in the same page, and wanted to be 20 % than they already were, they were excited with the results, knowledge of the gospel came easily, many were impressed with the way they taught, yet they wanted more, they used the second wish,, 70% smarter, soon they had lines of people waiting to be taught the gospel, which made the excitement intensify exponentially, so they had no doubt what they would ask for on the final wish ,100% smarter, ,,,, and wouldn't you know it they turned into sister missionaries..
Many years a in a different state a young man who was considered a border-line juvenile delinquent was called on a mission. When he returned from serving a full length honorable mission, the people of his home ward wouldn't accept that he had grown up and become a responsible man. People ignored him in the halls; one sister told his girlfriend's mother that if her daughter wanted to date an RM she should wait until so-and-so returned from his mission; the young man waited several weeks before he was asked to speak in Sacrament Meeting (he had had some incredible experiences, btw) while so-and-so spoke on Sunday when he had just arrived home the day before. The people of his ward could feel smugly self-righteous in their judgement because, after all, he and his wife did go inactive. Their daughter is a no-contact for fear she will ask to have her name taken off the rolls. Their grandson is growing up totally outside the church. And all because people would not accept that someone could repent and change.
Incidentally my daughter served her mission state side, not because she wasn't good enough to serve a foreign mission but because she had health issues and they wanted her in an area with good medical care.
Finally, do not judge a missionary by the number of his baptisms. Abinadi didn't baptize anyone from King Noah's court, but the seeds he planted led to eight generations of prophets, from Alma to Amos the second and his brother Ammoron.
My point is, be as kind and generous in your judgement of others as you want Heavenly Father to be when you stand before Him at the last day.
Very true if we will all undestand this the better.
The article makes a statement that is untrue. It says: "...you do need to be engaged in the work of Salvation to have the Spirit as an empowering force in your life." That is utterly and completely FALSE. The Holy Spirit is with us even when we are not actively engaged in the work of salvation. If we fall away, if we become lost, if we are having difficulty repenting, etc., the Holy Spirit is faithful!! The Spirit is faithful beyond what our limited minds can comprehend. Never, ever, ever let anyone tell you that the Spirit has left you because you weren't good enough. That is not true, not true, not true, regardless of what anybody says!!!
You only have the right to the companionship of the Holy Ghost as long as you are keeping your covenants, you covenant to be engaged in the work of salvation if you are not, you and breaking covenants and to the extent, you break them He will leave.
Please do not let anybody, ever, tell you that the Holy Spirit will leave you if you aren't good enough. That is absolutely not true. If you fall away from the church, if you become lost, the Holy Spirit is still there, always ready to lead you back to your Heavenly Father. The Spirit is faithful. Always. You are loved beyond measure, even when you are failing to be your best. Always remember, the Lord is you shepherd. And sheep don't get lost because they're sinful, they're just dumb. And Heavenly Father CREATED you! He knows there will be times when you are falling into sin. His Spirit is Faithful, Faithful, Faithful. Never let anyone tell you otherwise.
The Lord will not dwell in unholy temples. Neither will His Spirit. Your right to the Spirit ends when you dive into sin. Especially if that sin leads to broken covenants or apostasy.
The Church is true; sometimes members are not. Please read the scriptures and interpret them correctly as they are written. "Love one another as I have loved you."
This must be a Utah thing...Utah folks sometimes act like they are superor to all other folks. Especially they are color racist sometimes. They act superior to folks out of country and out of state. Something to think about when you think you are prefect.
I wrote this after experiences in New England, South Carolina, Tennessee, and North Dakota. So sadly it was not a Utah thing.
I loved what John Bytheway said in his talk about BOM Hereos. He focused one section on the missionary work of Abinidi. Abinidi might have died thinking that he didn't reach one person, but his testimony planted the seed of conversion for Alma and look at the amazing effect that held. you just never know what effect we have on those around us by those little seeds we plant.
We had elders and sisters at one time. 5 total. 2 went home, while 2 served elsewhere. We all had a great time. I miss having both at the same time. We only have sisters now. I miss them sooo much when the leave, yet excited to receive new ones at the same time.
I’ve been a member for 48 yrs and I’ve never heard nor believed any of these. IF a member serves (even a few days) they’re blessed because of their serving. Whether they serve at home or another area. Bottom line any member who serves in any calling or way they can, is blessed for their service. These and any other thoughts like them are from man, whom needs a change of heart.
I do not believe in this things in any way!! All missionaries are great,, and amazing people, yet, we are all different in many ways, so let us not judge them if they come home earlier because of some reasons,,. We'll for me, they are all amazing people and i love them so much specially the missionaries that assigned here in our ward!!
It really is time that church members especially in Utah stopped judgeing not only missionaries but members in general. They should read their guidelines on how to be more freindly and affible to people who visit the churchwho are members for a long time.I am sick of the attitude these people take . Actually i was disgusted when i went to church one sunday I didnt go again because i speak with a strong Australian accent people thought i was a redneck. how dare they critisise and belittle someone. We dont do that here in Australia.
start to wake up and change the attitude
RE#5: Moving-up-the-ladder in the church has, associated with it, some if-then logic. "If you are a given a certain calling, then you must have been worthy enough." This statement is TRUE. But every true if-then statement has a logical inverse which may or may not be. "If you are not given that calling, then you must not have been worthy enough." The inverse here is most likely FALSE. People who understand this immediately recognize #5 as a myth.
Of the four phases of missionary work, I would say retention is the most important. If you don't have that, the other three don't matter. I was in a ward that was pushing the first three steps, but had absolutely terrible retention, which made all the missionary efforts a Sisyphean exercise. Needless to say, that ward was eventually dissolved because it dwindled to just a couple families.
This needs to be updated to say that you can serve a service mission if you want to. You can choose to do a service mission. Also it needs to be addressed that those who do service missions are not lesser than those who proselytize. There is a stigma about this and it needs to go away. A service mission should not be considered shameful service in eyes of church members nor anyone else.